Matt Waldman’s Reads Listens Views is back and devoted to a short list of recommended reads, listens, and views for the week.
Welcome
If you’re new to the Rookie Scouting Portfolio blog, welcome. Friday is my one day off from football. It’s a day I devote to music lessons, reading, movies, and other mediums of value.
On some Fridays, I’ll scout players from the past to share What Made Them Great. In other weeks, I’ll have guests tell compelling short stories about their lives:
- Last month, I shared my successful experience as a stowaway on a commercial flight.
- The month before, TV and movie composer and bassist Adam Dorn shared a hilarious story about KISS bassist Gene Simmons making a bet with Dorn on the streets of NYC and losing in epic fashion.
On Fridays like today, I post links to pieces that I’ve found personally compelling or to content I hope will eventually scratch that itch when I get around to it.
You may not like everything listed here, but you’re bound to like something.
Reads
This was from a personal post on Facebook on Sunday in celebration of Alicia and my wedding anniversary. It struck a chord with a number of people, so I’ll share it here.
Yesterday was our anniversary. I always wanted to be married. I wondered if marriage would ever be a realistic expectation.
I had little exposure to a healthy marriage. Not on a daily level that influences your behavior.
I learned from failed relationships and individuals with disappointments and resentments stemming from unfulfilled expectations. Roleplaying and games were the lessons they took from their experiences.
“All men are . . . “
“All women are . . .”
The only way they could imagine getting what they wanted or needed was to capitulate and manipulate. Honesty? Directness? Ha!
Silly boy, that doesn’t work.
I knew what I wanted. It wasn’t what most were selling.
Still, I had no idea how to get it because I had unwittingly bought into everything I thought I was turning down.
Life is tricky sometimes. You think you’re running away from one thing only to discover that you just made a big circle and smacked into the back of what you were trying to escape.
From high school through the first 15 years of adulthood, I heard I was the type of man that most women would want to settle down with. I learned to project that image to please others. It wasn’t a conscious decision. I had no idea how to be honest with myself.
I wasn’t that man.
I’m still not that man, although I am routinely mistaken for it because I am easygoing, kind, and project stability. It led some women to think they could “mold,” “change,” or “train me.”
That didn’t turn out well. I’m a different bird. I’m fiercely independent and adventurous. I have moments of frightening intensity beneath the surface and I am next-level stubborn. It makes me scary and strange to others who think inside boxes.
My words said I wanted an equal partner. My actions said I wanted to hide from my vulnerability by focusing on the vulnerability of others. Men are often taught to be the savior on some level in their relationships.
If it works at all, it only works for so long before you come to the realization that you’ve helped create a relationship dynamic that doesn’t allow you and your partner to be equals on any level.
Once I learned to be honest about who I was, it became much easier to recognize who and what I wanted in my life.
And from our first conversation, Alicia, I knew I wanted to marry you. I told this to a long-time friend who called me minutes after our first chat. He didn’t say it, but I knew he thought I was crazy.
I thought I might be crazy. I never met anyone and my immediate thought was, “I just met my wife.”
Until I met you. Even so, knowing who and what I wanted and embracing it fully was a lot. Not because “you’re a lot,” although you’ve been told as much, but because saying you want to foster a relationship with direct communication, honesty, independence, and equality with another is different from stepping up and living it from the jump.
I don’t remember what you said or the situation that led to you testing the waters to see if I meant what I said and if I could handle it, but I remember that we were outside a store in Asheville, and I recognized the hidden gravity of what was on the surface, an innocuous moment.
I still remember thinking to myself as I held the door for you, “You said this is what you wanted. Are you ready?”
I turned back to the street briefly, smiled at the question in my head, and took a deep breath.
“Fuck it,” I whispered to myself and I followed you inside, closing the door behind me – and a way of living that never made any sense.
Being with you is, was, and will be the best decision I ever made. Happy Anniversary, Alicia. Allowing you to be you is easy.
Thank you for being real and allowing me the room to be the same. I love you.
Even when we try to be ourselves, there are a lot of reasons why what we observe and learn can get in the way of it. Learn to be yourself. It’s the best path toward so many good things in life — for you and anyone with whom you interact in a meaningful way.
Listens
Some of the best live and free jazz concerts featuring veteran masters and emerging stars of the scene can be found in pianist Emmet Cohen’s living room and streamed weekly on YouTube since the pandemic.
They were featured this week on Good Morning America.
Cohen and his trio are a worthwhile show on their own. Here’s a taste.
Here’s a full song from one of their many great concerts in its entirety, featuring Tivon Pennicott.
Views
Sometimes, a short clip with the right music and timing is a work of art. I can’t stop watching this one. The final kick in the sequence is a gorgeous shot.
And of course, if you want to know about the rookies from this draft class, you will find the most in-depth analysis of offensive skill players available (QB, RB, WR, and TE), with the 2022 Rookie Scouting Portfolio for $21.95.
Matt’s new RSP Dynasty Rankings and Two-Year Projections Package is available for $24.95
If you’re a fantasy owner and interested in purchasing past publications for $9.95 each, the 2012-2020 RSPs also have a Post-Draft Add-on that’s included at no additional charge.
If you’re a fantasy owner and interested in purchasing past publications for $9.95 each, the 2012-2020 RSPs also have a Post-Draft Add-on that’s included at no additional charge.
Best yet, proceeds from sales are set aside for a year-end donation to Darkness to Light to combat the sexual abuse of children.